The beginning...

August 25, 2011  bgodiver


My main blog is at times pretty personal and I realize there are some who would rather just read about my trip to Panama and my search for my future home as an expat.  So I will be posting the same Panama-related material from the primary blog here, but in reverse order so you can read about my trip from the planning stages through the day-by-day account of my journey, complete with photos.

So… Let me start at the beginning.

I lost my wife of nineteen years, Andrea, in May of 2010.  August 31, 2011, would have been our 20th anniversary.  As I got older (I turn 57 in December) Andrea and I had talked frequently about what retirement would look like and where it would take place.  Andrea was Australian and spent the first eight years of her life growing up in Melbourne.  She spent the next six years in the Philippines (Manila) before moving to the United States, followed by studies in Spain and extensive travel throughout Europe.  I, on the other hand, had traveled little outside of American borders before meeting Andrea and had never lived anywhere outside the U.S.

Although we were fortunate to have traveled in many parts of the world before she died, we both had wanted to see and experience more.  Shortly after her 35th birthday Andrea was diagnosed with advanced malignant melanoma; the doctor said she had about even chances of of seeing her 40th birthday.  It took some time for us to recover from the shock of it all, but after her surgery we knew that time may be short and we wanted to make the most of it.  We also agreed that retiring "elsewhere" would give us the opportunity to continue exploring and get to know more people, places and cultures – we didn't want life to become a downward spiral with the delivery of the first Social Security check.

When Andrea died suddenly, I was devastated.  She was only 44.  During the first months after she passed, I had no real reason to even get up in the morning.  I substituted long hours at work for the purpose Andrea had provided.  As time went on and my heart began to heal, I realized that each and every day of the previous nine years had been a precious gift.  I also came to the realization that I still wanted to retire as an expat even if it was on my own.  I began a search for just the right place.  Every time I run into an awkward situation during my travels because I can't speak another language (Andrea spoke four), I always manage to muddle through and I am once again reminded that life goes on.  Will I someday find someone new to share my heart with?  God willing, I certainly hope so!  In the meantime I continue to learn more about myself and become more certain that I am also ready to do this solo.  

To make a long story short, I had read a lot about Belize and decided this would be my first country to explore.  I spent eight days exploring coastal Belize last February, which placed it firmly on my list of possible future homes.  Now I will do the same in Panama between November 3 and 13. 

As with my Belize trip my goal in Panama is to do a bit of sight-seeing but mainly just wander around through various coastal towns, see what the stores are like, check out some real estate, have a few beers with the locals and generally just get a feel for whether or not this is a place and culture I would feel comfortable living in for my remaining years.  If I like what I see I will come back in the future after doing more research on specific locales.

Over the next 11 weeks I will post information as I come across it and start to plan my trip.  I'll give you the links to important web sites and lay out my thought process as I finalize the details.  And finally, I will do a day-by-day posting of my trip along with many pictures.  I learned a lot when writing my Belize blog (Belize in Eight Days) and hopefully will do better this time.  I imagine my readers will be a handful of friends and others, like me, who are interested in eventually retiring in Panama or just going there for a vacation.  If you have been there and have some advice or want me to check something out while I am there, please leave a comment -- I would love to hear from you!